Filed under: adoption
I am so upset right now. It has been months since I went to Atlanta and saw my birthfamily. Since then, my birthmother has traveled to Tuscon to see family and has had two family members come visit her. All I wanted was for someone to come visit me. All I wanted was for someone to acknowledge my life. All I wanted was for someone to reach out to me. My birthmother has called, but it is so erratic. She’ll call and now it’s not only small talk, she’ll actually listen to me. Then she wants to get off the phone quicker than usual and says she’ll call me back, but then she doesn’t. I wait. Then I get upset. I get so upset. The feeling is so intense. I just need to be acknowledged. I just need someone to come and see me. I spent so much time in the past two years reaching out to both my birthfamily, as well as my adoptive family, but it seems as if they think that since I’m 40, there is no need to nurture me. I need nurturing. I need someone to reach out to me. I feel so alone.
The best thing that has happened has been connecting with others who are adopted. Is this where I will find comfort? Will no one reach out to help me heal? Don’t they realize how much I need them? Don’t they realize that I am trying, but I can’t do it alone? They are still alive. There is still time, but it is slipping by. I told this to my birthmother once and she said that she didn’t feel the urgency as much as I did.
Filed under: adoption
I’ve started looking for personal films on adoption …
This one is by Bonnie.
Hoping to tackle the issue myself, in film, soon…
