E i l u j i o n

Letter to Birthfather
February 19, 2009, 8:14 am
Filed under: adoption | Tags: , , , ,

1342960012_311c0a0ddd_mSince my birthfather has rejected my birthmother’s attempt to communicate, I decided to send him a letter myself. I e-mailed it and used Did they Read It in order to track it. (If you sign up, you get to track 10 e-mails free for a month.) I was able to see that two hours after I sent the e-mail, he opened it for just a second (literally) and then two hours later, he opened it for about two minutes. This is what I said:

Hello ~

Recently Eileen contacted you regarding the fact that you guys worked together at Hillman’s grocery store in the suburbs of Chicago. She feels strongly that you are my birthfather, because she wasn’t with anyone else at the time. Though I can’t be certain whether or not you are my birthfather, I just wanted to contact you myself.

I understand that this is a strange situation, but I want you to know that I don’t want or expect anything from you. I don’t want to intrude on or disrupt your life or your family, I simply want to know something about my background.

I was adopted into a loving family, but like anybody who grows up adopted, I feel a particular need to to find out about my heritage and family history, and whether there are health issues I should know about. It would mean the world to me to know what nationality your family is… what your medical history is … and to see a picture of you.

I hope you can find compassion for my curiosity. I would be very grateful for your generosity. The information you could provide me would render a strong sense of peace.

Thank you for your time ~ Julie

This morning, I checked the tracking and noticed that he opened it once again, 15 minutes after I posted this.

Now it is the evening and I’ve noticed that he has opened it again.


5 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Hang in there. My son went through this. His birth father did not know he existed. I was very young when I had him. He is still working through that relationship and it has been 17 months now.

My thoughts are with you.

Comment by angelle2

Give him time…maybe this is just all a bit much for him to take. I know it’s hard..but hopefully the end result will be worth this heartache.


Comment by adoptedcricket

I hope you hear something soon!

Comment by Mary

Julie, I think it sounds very promising that he read your letter so many times. I hope you hear something soon :))

Kazi (adoptive mom)

Comment by Kazi

Hi Julie,
My name is Cesar and I have a daughter who does not know I am her birth dad. Long story short, her mother does not want her to know who I really am. She is 22 now, and her mother and I got married just 3 years ago, but my daughter still lives with my wife’s ex-husband who she believed is her father. What do you think? My wife says I will hurt my daughter if she knows I am her real dad… do yoou feel that way? It is ironic, you want to connect with your dad, me with my daughter… and it is not possible. Thanks, good luck!

Comment by Cesar

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