E i l u j i o n

Artist in Birthfamily Found
March 10, 2009, 12:02 am
Filed under: adoption, Creativity | Tags: , , , , , ,

hydrawing1I finally found out that the one artist in my family is alive! We lived in proximity to each other for years, but I never knew of him. I’ve been in touch with a friend of his who is an art director. I wrote about him in a couple of earlier posts – https://eilujion.wordpress.com/2007/09/22/artist-in-the-family/#comments & https://eilujion.wordpress.com/2009/03/03/job-near-birthmother-and-extended-family/

I found his daughter and also found out that he was in a nursing home. His friend went to visit him, printing out a picture that my birthmother had gotten from him when she was 10yrs old and had saved all these years. The picture on this post is of him drawing with a printout of the picture my birthmother had saved.

This is what his friend wrote after visiting:


I visited Hy today. He appeared glad to see me, but it’s very difficult to understand what he’s saying. I know he understands me.

I brought him the art supplies and got him draw something for you and asked him to sign it ‘For Julie’ and he did.

I think written communication would be best. I told him all about you but I’m not really sure he understood it all. I gave him the drawing he gave your mother, you can see it in the bottom photo.

Why don’t you write him and tell him the whole story. I’m sure he would be excited to know. And encourage him to draw. He hasn’t been drawing.

When I mentioned Tracy, he seemed to get a little sad. Guess he misses not seeing her.



October 26, 2007, 2:29 pm
Filed under: adoption, Artwork, Creativity

I drew this in 1995 while I was searching for my birth-mother. I feel like this now too.

It is a full moon today.

Artist in the Family
September 22, 2007, 1:32 am
Filed under: adoption, Creativity, Synchronicity

This is a picture that my birth-mother picked out of her cousin’s garbage when she was visiting him as a child. He didn’t think it was good enough and it was throwing it away. She took it. He was about 10 years older than her. Her family stopped visiting. Her father called his father a communist, though it sounds like he was a socialist who liked to talk a lot.

When I found my birth-family and they learned that I was an artist, my birth-grandmother said, “We only have one artist in the family.” She referred to him. No other direction was given to me. I did not make the initiative to contact him. It was just a fact and I was fascinated with the drawing. I felt such an affinity with the line-work.

Now that I’ve come back, his name came up again. This time I looked him up online. I found a website with samples of his work. I e-mailed the person hosting the site with his work. I have more information, but still haven’t been able to locate him.

The information I found was very interesting. He was into underground comics and also collected photographs and photo related items. These are two areas that I too am interested in. He also taught art related content in higher ed. He was published in various magazines, newspapers, and collections. He seems to be known as a satirical illustrator.

I wonder how much is inherited . . . It is as if we are different fragments of an original spirit.

September 21, 2007, 5:53 pm
Filed under: Artwork, Creativity

sculptureleft.jpgI just returned from a trip to visit my adoptive family. My adoptive-father introduced me to an 80 year old woman in his building who is a sculptor. He made a special effort to do this. He also made a special effort to take me to her studio. He noticed that her work reminded him of mine. He thought I would like it.

He is trying. He never understood. Neither of them did. They had me psychologically tested when I was younger. The woman told them that I was just extremely creative and that they should allow me to take an art class. I did, but when I went away to college, I had to complete a liberal arts major before I could take any art classes. I eventually majored in art and philosophy.

When they came to pick me up from school, the van would only fit so much. It was more important to take home an old bicycle and various other manufactured goods, than any of my sculptures. I had to leave them behind. I left them in a park near the city center. All I was able to hold onto were a few pictures. This is one.

Since then, I’ve intentionally taken work and left it in forests, parks, rivers and lakes. In my mind, I like to think of them as modern artifacts to be discovered by some explorer today or in the future…

Authentic Movement
September 9, 2007, 11:55 pm
Filed under: adoption, Creativity

IMG_4517.JPG Today I went to an authentic movement group that a friend of mine has been organizing for the past 6 years. It was amazing! In a nutshell, the ideas behind authentic movement are about using the body as a vehicle for expression. The following is a quote from the Authentic Movement Community :

“Authentic Movement’s original practitioners integrated Jung’s concept of active imagination with modern dance movement improvisation. Students of pioneers such as Mary Whitehouse, Joan Chodorow, and Janet Adler have developed the form in various ways including:

  • as a meditative, spiritual practice that integrates body and mind for increased access to consciousness.
  • as part of psychotherapy process, for enhanced sense of self and and well-being; often bringing unconscious thoughts to awareness.
  • as artistic support, to connect with creativity and creative process, unblocking and opening to new ideas.
  • as community outreach and development in community long circles, that address and solve community-wide problems.”

I have always been interested in movement as a vehicle of expression. I am not a dancer, but I use gesture and movement in my sculpture and animation work. There were 5 women in the group and adoption and birth seemed to be a focus for a few of us. I was upfront and told everyone that I was there in order to feel more connected to my body. The reunion experience has brought such a new found awareness of my physical self. I needed to use my body as a vehicle to understand how I am feeling.

The experience of moving in a silent room with 4 other interested/interesting spirits was wonderful. At first I felt stiff and was stretching. Then I would think of something to do with my body and before I knew it, my body began moving in ways I hadn’t intended. These movement triggered emotions. The emotions triggered new movements and so on . . .

There are no guidelines for reunion and there are certainly no guidelines for dealing with the emotions that rise from this unusual experience. I would recommend authentic movement to any adoptee who is dealing or trying to deal with reunion. Actually, I would recommend it to any adoptee who is really open to understanding who they are. Of course having a group is nice, but you can do it on your own too. Clear a space, turn off all sound and give yourself time to move. By turning off the sound, you can focus on your inner rhythm rather than being directed by an external force. Our group moved like this for an hour.

Ship Walk
September 17, 2004, 3:52 pm
Filed under: Artwork, Creativity

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September 17, 2004, 3:49 pm
Filed under: Artwork, Creativity

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